Life is Therapy

When you go through something troubling, remember that life can be its own form of therapy if you allow it. Life always has a way to help you heal the pain.

You can go for a walk or jog and see where your journey takes you, going wherever the path leads you….

You can listen to music, and allow it to take you to a peaceful plane, or to work out a certain emotion….

You can sit with a friend, and talk about the most trivial things, and let it be, or just have a laugh over nothing in particular….

You can see a dog with its head out the window of a car, truly joyful, perhaps beyond what most humans even experience, and let that sink in….

You can plant a seed and watch it grow and flower….

You can gaze into the clouds, or into the starry night, and search as far as you can….

You can lend a helping hand, finding the person who needs help more than you do….

Even when you are deeply troubled, unsure how to proceed, life can act as a form of therapy, helping you along through the storm.

You can sit back and listen with your whole body, not just your ears, and truly take in all that is happening as it happens, wherever you are, quieting the part of you that must explain and interpret all that it sees and hears….

You can find it in you to let go, to truly let go of whatever you have held onto so dearly, unable to let it be, and finally begin to open the path to somewhere….

You can observe a tree, the changing leaves of autumn, flowing with the wind, strong yet still….

You can sit in gratitude for the chance to experience anything at all, even the pain or troubles which have ultimately molded you into what you needed to be….

You can express yourself in any way that your heart would be contented to do, giving of yourself to the world….

You can simply be kind, patient, and heartfelt, even when these have not been granted to you….

How many examples must there be, infinite examples truly, where life is its own therapy? We simply must be aware and awaken to it.

Remember that for any troubles and pains, you can work through them and come out better on the other side.

Pursue Your Joy, Spread Your Joy

“It would have made things a lot easier if we understood there was no way of living that can immunize you against sadness. And that sadness is intrinsically part of the fabric of happiness. You can’t have one without the other.” – The Midnight Library, by Matt Haig

The new year is here. Have you fallen into the same old patterns as last year? Did you make resolutions, knowing that you probably won’t make them happen, because that’s how it usually goes? Or did you make a long list of things you want to do, and it’s simply too much, so you know that even if you want it to happen and work at it, you may not have the time and energy to make it happen?

Or, perhaps you made a shortlist of critical things in your life that you are motivated to change. And you made a list of specific steps or actions to take. Then great! I’m guessing you will fulfill your plans in that case.

Or, maybe last year was hard enough to get through, and you feel good about yourself if you’re just able to get by at this point. I’m sure that this is a reality for many of us.

As we make our plans for the new year, keep this in mind:

Let’s not forget what brings us true joy. Let’s do more of that, and put more of that out into the world.

I just saw The High Note yesterday, and Dakota Johnson’s character says that she wants to make music that can help people feel less alone. Music helped her get through hard times in her life, and she wants to make music that will do the same for others.

Sometimes I think we view the pursuit of our joy as something selfish, but that isn’t necessarily the case. Often, it seems that in bringing ourselves joy, we can create something and share it with others, and they can share in some of that joy with us.

Is there something that brings you joy that you have neglected? Could this also spread joy to others?

I believe it is never too late to learn, try something new, and become who you truly wanted to become. Personally, it gives me strength to see that the things that bring me joy could truly mean something to other people too. There is no way to know until you do it or create it and share it.

Often, we get stuck in a rut and repeat the patterns of yesterday, and the day before that, and even last year, and the year before that. The first step to break these patterns is to see that they are there. Some hidden forces are guiding you to do just what you did before, again and again. Going to the same places, talking to the same people, doing the same things. Maybe this is fine if this is what you wanted. But is it truly what you wanted?

If not, only you can choose to break free from the mold you’ve created for yourself.

I find that to move toward joy, you have to make a commitment to yourself, and perhaps to someone else too. Then, you have to make the time for what you really want to do. I sense that my mind is always subconsciously monitoring and thinking this:

What would I normally do at this time? Let’s do that.

At breakfast time, I eat breakfast. At work time, I work. When it’s time to eat dinner and relax and watch TV, I do that. At my usual reading time in the evenings, I read. Usually, in the evenings, I also do some quick chores such as cleaning up, dishes or running other errands. In the course of a normal day, most of my time slots are filled. So this leaves weekends to work out anything I want to accomplish beyond my work goals. I make it a point to leave my weekends mostly open. This can be good and bad. They’re open and free, so I can do anything, but in reality, this may be time that goes wasted.

I have patterns that tend to hold for my weekends. I may be inclined to sleep in later, watch more TV, and play video games, but instead of this, I should be asking myself: What will bring me true joy and help spread this to others as well?

And so, for me, as far as making time for joy goes, this is the solution. I need to more carefully examine my weekends to see if I could do something more. For example, I can make time to read, learn to cook a new dish, chat with friends and family, look for ways to help out the community, exercise, write and review my poems or short stories, and so on.

I have many, many goals, but it makes sense to take some of that free time on the weekends and convert it into something that brings a longer-lasting, higher-quality type of joy. For you, you may consider if you can make some time first thing in the morning, right before bed, during a lunch break, or perhaps on the weekends.

Ask yourself:

What time am I wasting, that I could use to do something that brings me joy?

I included the quote at the top of this post because it makes a good point that we should not forget. The sadness is inevitable. I pursue joy and wish to spread more of it, but there are times when anyone can feel sad or down. I’m not in the pursuit of pure bliss, as such feelings are, of course, fleeting. I aim to make the best of the moments that come my way. But I also aim to create a world (in my own small way) that can build better moments for us all.

I aim to be content with what is while still making improvements. This can seem paradoxical – as if you are content, why would you need to improve? However, I’m not just content but also tremendously grateful for everything in my life. I feel it is my responsibility to work hard, help people, and spread joy and wisdom however I can.

Joy is something that I do pursue, but I know that this is not something I can ever catch. You may as well try to catch the oxygen sitting in front of you. And the fact that joy inevitably will come and go also means that sadness will inevitably come and go. If joy leaves you suddenly, sadness will tend to come and fill its place.

Joy and sadness are a normal part of the ebbs and flow of this human life.

All we can do is try to sit in peace with this reality. And those who are filled with joy can do their best to spread some of that to those who truly need it.

Don’t Let This Year Pass By, Wasted. Pursue Your Joy. Spread Your Joy.

Don’t know what to do with your time? Consider doing something for your health, such as exercise, mental training, expressing your creativity, or volunteering to help those in need. If you love to do something, you can spread the joy by introducing someone else to the topic or activity.