I Have Arrived

As surely as I was born, I am here now.

Just as life’s goal for me then was to arrive, it is such now.

And just as the goal of that arrival was to live, it is such now.

And just as the goal of birth was to arrive at death, it is such now, too.

And thus, life’s goal is to be born, to live, and to perish.

The commonality among these is that the goal is to arrive.

One arrives at birth, here where one was before not here.

One arrives at life, present at a moment that was before not here.

One arrives at death, to life after life, to what was before not here.

But how can we arrive at the here and now, when perpetually reminded of all we lack?

How can we arrive when we anticipate where we will be, at every turn?

How can we arrive when we see some things as good and others as bad, and tend to aim for more of the good and less of the bad, perpetually.

How can we arrive when arrival is seen as no better than any other thing?

Let’s speak of the paths that lead away from arrival, of which there are many:

It is the idea of not having what someone else has. Then you are wishing and striving, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that you need to get somewhere by doing something. Then you are living a life of doing that leads to more doing, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that you must do one more thing, and then you will be done. Then you are doing one more thing, which leads to doing one more thing, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that a good person must do this or that, or have this or that. Then you have created a formula for living that has no end, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that you are the one who knows the right way to tell others and lead them to something. Then you presume to be a chosen one, and without you, the people will not know what to do, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that you must produce a certain amount to be worthy. Then, there will always be more to produce, or an unexpected problem or illness will make you feel worthless, and you have not arrived.

It is the idea that to fill your mind with certain ideas is a worthy path. Then, there will always be newer, more precise ideas to learn, making your old ones unworthy, and you have not arrived.

You may wonder, is there really a way to arrive?

That, I do not know.

I have not arrived, and I do not know who has. It may be your neighbor, schoolteacher, priest, or scholar, or it may be none.

But the paths outlined before us in this life do not lead us to arrive. The paths made available to us were created by those who never arrived. This is something to consider.

There never was a path to arrive at anything, not one that we were consciously going to locate and set out on, anyway.

In striving for anything, this is an acknowledgment that we have not arrived and probably never will. To strive is to aim to be where you are not, which shows you have not arrived.

To arrive would mean to have let go of the need to grasp or let go.

It would mean to let go of the need to advance or retreat.

It would mean to let go of the need to help or hinder.

It would mean to let go of the need to participate or spectate.

It would mean letting go of the need to create or preserve an image of yourself or the desire to abandon it.

It would mean to let go of the need for praise and be unconcerned with criticism.

It would mean to let go of the need for success and be unconcerned with failure.

To arrive would likely mean to find it in you not to be concerned with the idea of arrival, as it is just another idea. In striving for arrival, like anything else, you would just be proving the fact that you had not arrived.

Say to yourself, “I have arrived,” and see that you do not believe it and that it has not happened.

Or say to yourself, “I have arrived,” and see that you do believe it and that it has happened.

And upon arrival, if you see this as an accomplishment, you can see that you have not arrived. You will feel the need to meet that accomplishment, again and again, proving that you have not arrived. To pursue something is to prove that you do not have it.

I

HAVE

ARRIVED

Who Can Truly Teach You?

“Believe me: It is no teaching and no instruction that I give you. On what basis should I presume to teach you? I give you news of the way of this man, but not of your own way. My path is not your path, therefore I cannot teach you. Within us is the way, the truth, and the life.” – The Red Book (Liber Novus) by C. G. Jung

This is a powerful insight and one that I have been contemplating in my own way. This Thought suggests that no one can truly teach us, and in the end, we must find our own way. Ultimately, anything that we are taught is likely to apply to someone else, perhaps of a different time, context, and situation. In that way, the teachings we are given have a way of leaving us behind if we do not adapt and find our own way.

My current way is to read as much as I can and absorb as much knowledge and understanding as possible. Yet, some of the most advanced thinkers I have known of (some personally, and some through books such as Jung’s) have spent great deals of time searching for their own way rather than looking beyond themselves for it. Perhaps they haven’t merely searched but created and cultivated their own way of seeing and being. They have reached a stage of not needing the teacher and not even needing to teach, necessarily.

Of course, a key part of thinking involves knowledge, and where do we get our knowledge from?

In reading, or in learning generally from the world around us, we can see different types of knowledge. There is anecdotal knowledge – meaning that there is some information that pertains to a particular person at a point in time.

There is scientific knowledge – meaning that some information has been found to apply to a particular group of people, and we can figure that this information is likely to transfer to another similar group of people. For example, research conducted on smokers is likely to apply to other people who smoke, even those who did not participate in the research.

Then there is spiritual knowledge – meaning information that has somehow surpassed the need for the anecdotal or scientific understanding. With this kind of knowledge, we come to know some deeper part of ourselves, the universe, or others without necessarily being able to explain it in words or relationships.

You may be surprised to learn that often, none of the above types of knowledge will give you certainty. Anecdotal knowledge may apply just to particular cases and not universally. Scientific knowledge may apply generally and not necessarily to your specific case.

Spiritual knowledge may apply to only the individual spirit, yet this spirit may be interconnected with other spirits or the universe more deeply. Theoretically, spiritual knowledge can transcend our finite being, and tap into something much deeper and greater, perhaps even infinite. Yet this knowledge is not easily put into words and cannot be conveniently revealed to anyone else.

Jung is interested in spiritual knowledge and seems to have lost the need or desire for anecdotal and scientific knowledge, which has failed him on his quest for true spiritual understanding.

Jung clearly believes in a soul, which is the idea that we have an eternal element within us. Given this idea, it makes sense that one could gain deeper truths within rather than searching for them in a universe that is in constant states of change. I have read other works which state that scientifically, there is no proof or even evidence of a soul – and you can make of that what you will and figure out where you stand on this issue.

Some assume we have a soul, and others say there is no evidence of one. What do you think?

Do you have a soul? Do you believe the idea is misguided and does not exist? Or do you think we have lost our souls, and need to find them once again?

Are you part of an eternal, infinite realm that connects you to the past, before you were born, and the future, after your death, and perhaps to alternate realities and dimensions? Or are you just here, just now, just limited to what we see? Personally, I think it is fun to speculate on this. However, I am also a pragmatist, and I like to focus on ideas that can help to learn something valuable and not just get stuck in speculation.

On a practical level, I believe that there is some true knowledge and understanding to be gained by looking within, rather than spending all our time captivated by the whims of our external reality, of the happenings around us.

But who can teach us to look within, and what does this even mean? First, this has to be something that we wish to pursue. We have to get fed up with the transient noise that everyday life brings us. Is every day just some new trivial drama to attend to? Some chores that must be taken care of? Some enjoyment gotten from a silly task or screen? A search to satisfy our need for more, whether it be more money, things, or the adoration of people we barely know? Is that what we are here for, or is there something more?

Then we have to get fed up with teachers who have led us astray. The teacher who taught us to want a particular thing, solve a certain problem in a certain way and not in some other way, see some as good and others as evil, follow arbitrary rules, and so on. Perhaps some of the teachings led us to make more mistakes, question or dampen our own spirit, or ultimately regret having been taught.

I have found that the best teachers are the ones who allow you to create your own path, make your own mistakes, and form your own distinct footprint on the world.

I admit, I sometimes wonder – what would have happened if I had never been taught? Would I have learned more through my own curiosity, will, and searching? Or would I have become a hopeless case, an ignorant fool? Ultimately, I would have found my own way, just via a different route. The key is to teach our students how to find their own way, and not limit them and make them need to have a teacher for life.

When we finally get fed up with the fact that our daily patterns, teachings, sources of information, and everything in our lives is not truly teaching us anything worthwhile, then the only place left to look is within. You do this by being quiet with yourself. Meditating, or not. Simply sitting in quiet, thinking about your life, your wants. Then you think, “Why?” Why did you do things this way and not that way? Why did you want this and not that? What did it ultimately matter when you got that thing you wanted? Or what did it matter when you didn’t get that thing you wanted? What was the difference in the end?

What were the things that ultimately mattered? Was it the things as they happened, or your beliefs about what those things meant? Was it the experience, or the interpretation of that experience?

What are you thirsting after? It’s always something. The next TV show. The next book. The next teacher. The next restaurant. The next place to visit. The next thing to buy that will solve all our problems (but it never does).

But do we know ourselves? Soul or not, do we know who we truly are? Are we here to fall in line and be told who we are by others? Or to discover our own true path in life?

I can’t teach you who you are. I can’t even teach you how to figure out who you are. I am the teacher who doesn’t know how to teach and doesn’t want to teach, but maybe that is the best teacher to have. I’m not sure anyone else can teach you who you are or how to find who you are. No one can be your teacher for this. The universe itself must be your teacher.

I wonder: What are your fundamental truths? By this, I mean the things you know to be true and do not need a pile of evidence for. You simply know them. Maybe this is something that points you toward your soul. Or maybe this is something your soul is pointing you toward.

Where is your spiritual knowledge? Have a conversation with your spirit, and learn about your true self. Not the wants, but something deeper. You may have to invent a new language or create a new way of perceiving. Perhaps your spirit has its own unique way that cannot be easily explained or thought of in mere words, relationships, and images. You may be surprised that who you are in your daily life is not at all the spirit within. And that is fine. This experience is just learning, and discovering your spiritual knowledge, your true self.

If it helps, release yourself from the pressure. Sit in silence, and do not pressure yourself to go in any direction. Do not question and interrogate yourself and judge yourself. Just let yourself flow out from yourself, like a river, a stream. Pour out, and stop holding it all back.

Our human ways in modern society are walls, dams, holding back our spirit’s way. So this may be a journey for you, a new path that you need to set on.

Are you Personally Fulfilled? (What is Success, Really?)

We tend to throw around words like “success,” – and usually, I think it is assumed that we are talking about bigger paychecks, faster cars, and gated communities. But is this really all there is to success, or is there something we are missing here?

Whenever someone mentions success, I always find myself thinking to myself:

What is success, really?

A study I read showed that college students tend to drink more alcohol than they would like, and this happens because they think everyone else is drinking a lot and enjoying it. Because of these perceptions, they feel like they should be drinking more and enjoying it. This ends up with college students drinking more than they would truly like – which perpetuates the idea that college students drink a lot and like it.

Extrapolating from this, sometimes I wonder if many people are chasing what they think other people view as success.

These perceptions of success are perpetuated in the news, media, social media, and so on. The idea that is created through this is that:

You should want conventional ideas of success for yourself, or something is wrong with you.

Some popular influencers will hire a model or rent fancy cars or create a background that makes it look like they are on a private jet. They will include these props in their supposedly real videos to create the illusion of success. Perhaps they all bought into the idea that they should want success, and perhaps they thought that by appearing to be successful, others would be more interested in them (thus, helping to actually make them successful).

For most people, is it more important to actually be successful, or are we just obsessed with the need to appear successful?

In life, I think we are often presented with a choice. Will we allow others to impose their ideas on us, or will we take the time to think things through and form our own thoughts and ideas?

Consider: What is success to you?

To me, it’s not about the money, the houses, or even the appearance of having it.

At its most basic element, to me, success is fulfillment.

So then, what is fulfillment?

You can be fulfilled in many different ways.

Purpose

One of the primary roads to fulfillment is to know what your purpose is. What do you find meaning from in your life? Many of us will find purpose through our work, helping others, improving ourselves, or raising children.

Physical (e.g., exercise and stamina)

We can find physical fulfillment through exercise, playing sports, or even just walking. Some people need more physical activity to feel fulfilled, and others can get by with less. However, a part of meeting our fulfillment will likely involve keeping ourselves in a good enough shape that we can be satisfied with and meet our other life goals.

Mental (e.g., intellectual, creative)

Mental fulfillment may be found through challenging yourself intellectually or creatively. Some people who always like to read, learn, or discuss interesting ideas will have a high need for mental fulfillment. We all have different needs in this regard, too – some people may meet this by painting or drawing, and others may need a mentally engaging job to feel fulfilled. Some people need to change things up regularly – they may enjoy being with nature, traveling, visiting museums, and learning about different cultures.

Social (e.g., bonding, spending quality time, and emotional support)

Most of us interact with a variety of social circles regularly, such as family, friends, colleagues, and perhaps neighbors or other acquaintances. As I keep stating, we all have different needs in this regard. Some people only need a few friends to feel fulfilled, and others will need many more. In general, we all need to engage with some people to feel whole. In the end, this is likely because our individuality happens in the context of the people around us (e.g., how can you be the shy one or the funny one if there is no one else there?)

Spiritual (and mental health / mental balance)

Some people may not like the term spiritual if you do not relate to it, but in that case, you can view this as mental health and balance. There are many ways to pursue this, of course. Some have prayer, meditation, yoga, or positive thinking. Some people may explore their thoughts and beliefs through journaling their personal journey. Of course, one way to strive for spirituality and mental balance is to make sure to pursue all the other ways toward fulfillment – purpose, physical, mental, social, and values. For me, spirituality also involves considering my personal role in the whole universe and how I interconnect with everyone and everything.

Living By Your Values

It makes perfect sense to me that you must know your highest values and live according to them to be fulfilled. If you are not living according to what you think is most important, how could you possibly be fulfilled?

To help you brainstorm which values are most important to you, here is a list of 50 core values from James Clear’s website.

My core values are truth, balance, love, knowledge, and transference – which I discussed more deeply in this post - The Path to a True and Fruitful Life.

Final Thoughts

True success lies in fulfillment. To recap, the ways to fulfillment are by pursuing your purpose, and also physically, mentally, socially, spiritually, and living by your values.

Before you go, consider these questions:

• How fulfilled are you in your life?

• What can you do to become more fulfilled?

• Is there something in your life you can let go of which has not properly fulfilled you?

• Did fulfillment mean something completely different for you?